...It's ok, I like being alone...
There has got to be something wrong with me. It's final. I'm never going to get married. I've got way too many commitment issues. I just don't get it. I think that part of my brain is broken. LOL
I'm not really that picky, I don't ask for much. I just for some reason, find myself in these GREAT relationships but after a few months to a year -- I start to lose interest. My last 3 or so girlfriends have seemed very promising. Not only to me, but to everyone around me. We were ALL sure that we were going to be together for the rest of our lives. Yah, well... that doesn't last.
The sad reality is, ...It's ALWAYS me that has the issue. I'm always the one that loses interest, and calls things off. Usually I find that the girl is missing one measly thing from my list of demanding requirements. Most people I'm sure would probably overlook the stupid little things on my list, but for some reason, no matter how hard I try to look past them, they just continue to burn a hole in my subconscious and eventually I have to face the fact that it bugs the shit out of me. My demanding list is as follows:
Ok, ok... so maybe I'm picky. I don't know... I never really thought that I was that hard to please. But, over the years... I found that these things are important to me in my half-hearted search for the "one of my dreams."
I always seem to find the perfect girl, "BUT.... "
That my friends IS the problem. I guess I'm doomed. Oh well... I'll be starting the countdown to 30 here pretty soon. Better figure something out.
*V*
I'm not really that picky, I don't ask for much. I just for some reason, find myself in these GREAT relationships but after a few months to a year -- I start to lose interest. My last 3 or so girlfriends have seemed very promising. Not only to me, but to everyone around me. We were ALL sure that we were going to be together for the rest of our lives. Yah, well... that doesn't last.
The sad reality is, ...It's ALWAYS me that has the issue. I'm always the one that loses interest, and calls things off. Usually I find that the girl is missing one measly thing from my list of demanding requirements. Most people I'm sure would probably overlook the stupid little things on my list, but for some reason, no matter how hard I try to look past them, they just continue to burn a hole in my subconscious and eventually I have to face the fact that it bugs the shit out of me. My demanding list is as follows:
- Needs some sort of belief in God.
- Some level of higher education would be nice, but isn't absolutely mandatory.
- Needs some level of gumption in life.
- Must like sex. (A lot)
- Obviously I need to be physically attracted to her.
Ok, ok... so maybe I'm picky. I don't know... I never really thought that I was that hard to please. But, over the years... I found that these things are important to me in my half-hearted search for the "one of my dreams."
I always seem to find the perfect girl, "BUT.... "
That my friends IS the problem. I guess I'm doomed. Oh well... I'll be starting the countdown to 30 here pretty soon. Better figure something out.
*V*
posted by viperbux at 2:37 AM
7 Comments:
Wow..... I seem to have everything that was on your list but it still didn't work out. Even you claim that the biggest regret in your life was not marrying me when you had the chance. I too believe that you will never get married... It was great while it lasted, but we both know it never would have worked because of your fears. I feel sad for you because I know the potential you have for love and yet you run away from the people that make you happiest in life. I hope you'll get over your issues someday and find love greater than you've ever had and realize that you never want to spend a day without that person in your life. You really are a great guy and I'll always have a place for you in my heart. Just a word of advice the next time around... Don't think with your mind... listen to your heart. That's the only way you'll ever get what you really want.
You know, there isn't a time limit on how long you have to find a girl before you've just gotten too old to be happy. A wise man once told me that it's better to wait for "the one" than to settle for someone that just doesn't feel right.
The first few months are the glory months of any relationship. After about the 3rd month, things get serious and it's not a bad thing if, at that point, you find yourself deciding whether or not it's worth it to continue. The fact that it's always you losing interest could just mean you pick up on the "time to move on" vibe first.
Don't worry, I promise you're not as doomed as you think you are.
Nice list! ;) I feel the same way - although I've got a few years before I hit the big three-o. But don't let the situation get you down. The way I see it, you get to meet many more interesting people this way; have many more differing experiences. You'll have different influences on your life that will shape your soul. Perhaps you aren't "shaped" the way you were meant just yet, and that's the reason why you haven't found "the one." Patience runs short - trust me, I know... but it's the only thing that you can do.
I couldn't help but read the other comments left for you... the running away thing - if true... have you ever found out why you do that? (no answer required... just a thinking question). That could be your key to settling down though... I'm sure you already knew that ;)
I want to thank you again for the continued responses on my blog. I knew about the spider thing, but I always thought it was 8 spiders in a year.... a lifetime sounds a little easier to stomach ;) take care and have a great weekend!
hey there - thanks for the continued comments. look forward to reading an updated blog from you
~amy
nah - i don't mind one bit; i look forward to reading comments. cold and snowy? you suck! i hate hot weather! where are you from?
When you get smitten, she may be the worst choice in the world for you but you will be so hopelessly insane you will ache. Love stinks is not just a song. Hope you don't mind getting advice from an old maid librarian.
For some reason I seem to have the same problem.. Just the opposite sex. But mine never gets as serious as yours have and those little quarks they are missing or have that drive me crazy.. literally drive me crazy. I cant over look them as much as I try.. But then I realized that when the right one comes and "kicks me on my ass", as you would say, I'll be hopefully able to overlook those little issues.. But then again maybe people like us really are broken.. hm...
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